


Blue Sunday

by violetra



Category: Far Cry (Video Games), Far Cry 5
Genre: Angst and Romance, Betrayal, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Flashbacks, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Originally Posted on Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-15 20:58:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16940616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetra/pseuds/violetra
Summary: After one of Joseph’s sermons, Jacob is forced to confront the woman he loves. Too bad she’s in love with his brother now.





	Blue Sunday

Jacob focused on his peripheral vision and listened in on the two beside him who were whispering to each other. She giggled softly. God, he hadn’t heard that sound in a long time. The girl entwined her fingers tightly with the man next to Jacob, his brother. John’s tattooed hand engulfed hers, squeezing it tightly as Joseph continued his sermon. Jacob focused back on his other younger brother who was standing behind the podium in front of him. Joseph noticed Jacob’s expression, one that did not look happy.

“Forgiveness, I believe, is something we all have a challenging time finding. Forgiveness and acceptance are what human’s have the most trouble with grasping. But once we do, the weight on our shoulders are unbelievably relieved. We become that much closer to finding peace and clarity.” Joseph lectured on, locking eyes with Jacob the entire time.

 _“I love you, Jacob. I love you so much it hurts me.”_ S _he said softly._

Those words still haunted him, because he still didn’t understand what she meant by them.

‘It’s hard to forgive the person you’re still in love with who doesn’t love you anymore.’ He thought to himself as that familiar giggle rang out again. John hushed her to stay quiet. Jacob felt one his hand’s ball into a fist.

At the end of the sermon, Joseph began walking towards the doors of the church. Everyone else stood up next to follow. As tradition, each visitor greeted Joseph by shaking his hand, giving him a hug, or a kiss on the cheek. Jacob and his family were the last to walk down the aisle.

Jacob’s eyes found the back of her head like a magnet. He couldn’t help staring at her long, wild, golden waves. He watched as they bounced and gleamed in the light with each step she took. He ground his teeth together each time John ran his hand through her hair possessively. Jacob remembered how soft her hair was, how easy it tangled around his fingers, and how good it smelt every time she washed it with that weird shampoo she swore by.

_“You know Jacob, if you only tried it you would understand!” she said defensively._

_“How about you get in the shower with me and wash my hair then?” Jacob asked mischievously. She smacked him on the shoulder playfully._

Jacob was startled by Faith, who had been standing behind him. She patted him on his shoulder, as if to tell him everything would be okay. His heart ached as they reached the front of the church and she spoke to Joseph first.

“That was a lovely sermon, Father. Are we still on for dinner tonight?” she said as he took her hand into his. Jacob remembered how wonderful of a cook she was.

_“Jacob, you say your favorite meal is steak and potatoes, but I’m pretty sure it’s actually my lasagna.” She said as she watched the large man scarf the meal down in front of him._

_“Maybe so, but only yours, angel.”_

“Of course, Ava. I can’t wait to visit you and John. I’d love to see what you’ve done with the Ranch since you’ve moved in.” He said, his eyes drifting to his younger brother.

“I think you’ll find her tastes are extraordinary.” John said, placing an arm around her and a kiss on top of her head.

“I don’t doubt it.” Joseph chuckled, releasing her hand. As the woman exited the church, Joseph reached out and grabbed onto John’s shoulder, bringing him closer to whisper something. Jacob tried to listen in on their exchange, but Joseph was an expert at concealing conversations.

After a few seconds, Joseph released John, giving him one last nod of the head before John’s exit. Jacob walked up to Joseph and gave him a hug. Jacob mumbled a compliment over his shoulder. Joseph thanked him, knowing his older brother wasn’t keen on showing much affection.

“Someone wanted to talk to you before you left. They know your visits here can be rare at times.” Joseph said in a not so pleased tone. Jacob tried to make up excuses as to why he couldn’t make all of Joseph’s sermons, but they both knew what the real reason was.

_“I love her, brother! Please don’t send her to John’s.” Jacob begged._

_“It won’t be long. I just need her there for a few months. We don’t have a lot of doctors and the Valley needs medical attention desperately. He’ll watch over her.”_

Joseph pressed his forehead to Jacob’s.

“Hopefully I’ll see you soon, brother.” Joseph said. Jacob gave him a small smile before walking out of the doors of the small church.

Jacob scanned around, looking for anyone who was trying to get his attention, but he saw none. He found John, who was talking to a group of people, but with no Ava nearby. Deciding he wasn’t in the mood to be waiting around for someone to approach him, he began to walk towards his jeep. It was parked far from any other cars or people for that matter.

As Jacob came around the front he remembered he had put a few of Ava’s belongings in the back of his car. Jacob figured since John was still there, it would be an appropriate time to give them to him. But as Jacob rounded the side of his car, he almost yelled out as he bumped into someone, presumably the person who had wanted to see him.

It was her. It was Ava. Jacob backed up, creating a gap between the two. He couldn’t help but look her up and down, noticing how beautiful she looked in her mint-colored dress. Her usual makeup-free face was practically beaming.

“Hi Jacob, how are you?” She asked. Jacob was taken aback by her cheeriness.

“Really? That’s the first thing you say to me in eight months?” Jacob asked, voice full of venom. Ava’s expression changed immediately, showing what Jacob assumed to be pity. He hated it when people pitied him.

“I wanted to see you. I’ve been very busy you know.” She said.

“Yes. Lots of patients I’m sure. My brother is probably a handful too.” He said, trying to lighten his tone. Ava’s fingers drifted to the ends of her hair, twirling them around delicately. Jacob knew she did that whenever she was nervous. Jacob remembered the first time he had asked her out on a “date” she had done the same thing then.

_“Ava, I know I’m just an old man, but would you do me the favor of joining me on this hunting trip? Lord knows, you need to start learning how to fire a weapon.” Jacob asked, trying not to stumble over any of his words. She began twirling her hair with her fingers, trying to form her strands into ringlets._

_“Well I have been wanting to learn. And Jacob, you’re not that old.” She said, giving him a reassuring smile. Jacob placed a hand on her shoulder and began leading her towards his small armory at the Veteran’s Center._

“I wanted to tell you something, and I wanted you to hear it from me and not anyone else.” She said, reaching down to hold one of his hands. Jacob wrenched his hand away, not because he didn’t want to feel her touch, but because he didn’t want her to feel how sweaty his palms had become. She looked like she was hesitant to tell him.

“What is it?” He asked, sounding concerned. She opened her mouth a few times before finally speaking.

“John asked me to marry him. And I think I’m going to say yes.” She said slowly, casting her eyes down to the ground. Jacob instantly felt nauseous as his stomach clenched into a ball, refusing to unravel itself as a stream of sickness revered into his throat. He swallowed it down before talking again.

“Then marry him, Ava. Do you want my blessing or something?” he asked, crossing his arms as if he was creating an imaginary wall between the two of them.

“I loved you, Jacob,” she began. Loved. That word punched him hard in the stomach, more than any blow he had taken in a fight. It felt like a dark cloud was forming around Jacob’s head, turning his vision gray and lifeless.

“But you didn’t want to marry me. No matter how many times I asked you said no. You wouldn’t even hold my hand in public.” She said, looking back up to Jacob. He only shook his head angrily, leaving his arms crossed like a stone barrier. He remembered it perfectly.

_“Jacob don’t you love me?” she asked, turning to face him._

_“Of course, I do, Ava.” He said quietly._

_“Then why won’t you hold my hand? I love you and I want everyone to know.” She said reaching down to find his hand. He curled his fingers to stop her._

_“We’ll talk about this later, angel.”_

Jacob never did talk to her about it. It was all because he wanted to look more tough in front of his men. He wanted to kick his past self in the ass.

“John cares about me, and I know you do but-, “

“But what Ava?” Jacob interrupted her. “You’re telling me that John doesn’t still have his harem of women following him around?” He spat out. Her eyes welled up with tears at his coldness.

“Of course, he doesn’t. He loves me, and he’s not afraid to tell me so.”

Jacob uncrossed his arms and moved his hand to find hers, gripping it tightly before he spoke again. Jacob was reminded of how soft and fragile she was. He had always called her his little dove. His thumb stroked her hand as he searched for the right words to say. She always knew how to make him speak his mind, an unblessed talent and curse.

“I love you, with all of my heart. I’m sorry I didn’t show it as much as you deserved. I’m sorry I said I didn’t want to marry you, because of course I wanted to marry you.” He said bringing his other hand to her cheek to wipe away a single tear.

“Then why didn’t we?” Ava asked with a quivering lip. Jacob looked up to the sky, embarrassed he was about to admit his fears. He looked back down and into her big, brown eyes.

“I thought I was too old for you. I thought you were better off marrying someone who could spend more time with you in life, who could give you children. I wanted you to be able to sleep soundly every night, not terrified someone’ll hurt you in their sleep. I wanted the best for you, and I knew that wasn’t me.” He said, his heart beating a million times a minute. He wiped another one of her tear’s away.

“You can’t be mad at me then for finding someone. I love him, Jacob.” She said quietly. Jacob swallowed the lump in his throat.

“Out of everyone, I never thought it would be John. My own brother.” Jacob said, trying to hold his tongue. He really wanted to tell her every appalling story from John’s past. He wanted to tell her about the drugs, the women, and the partying. But Jacob remembered he wasn’t any better moral-wise compared to his brother.

“You know it’s not too late for me to say no. We can see if there’s anything still there.” She said bringing her own hand to his cheek. That’s when he noticed the small tattoo on the inside of her wrist. It was an Eden’s Cross, along with “J and A” underneath it. He knew that the “J” didn’t stand for Jacob. He knew what his brother’s work looked like. Jacob removed her hand from his cheek, saddened as the warmth from her hand dissipated from his skin.

“It’s too late. You made your choice, you need to stick with it. Tell John you’ll marry him. Don’t break his heart, too.” Jacob said. He was sure she was only saying this because she felt bad for him. Jacob thought back on that day Joseph had visited him after Ava had been gone for a few months.

_“Jacob, I think John likes her. I think she likes him too.” He said, trying to sound like he felt sorry for his brother. Jacob knew better. He saw that devious glint in Joseph’s eyes._

_“Isn’t that what you wanted? John needed someone to bring him back to Earth and I needed to be pushed back into the forest. Am I wrong?” Jacob asked. He felt like he had a sword in his back._

_“I didn’t expect them to grow that close. I just needed someone who’s dedicated to the project to remind him of his purpose.” Joseph said shaking his head._

_‘Bullshit.’ Jacob thought._

_“And it’s no secret you’ve been slacking. You’re a soldier, you need focus while we try to build our community.”_

_For the first time, Jacob really wanted to strangle his brother._

“For what it’s worth, John does seem happier. Him and Joseph haven’t been this close in a long time.” Jacob said, giving her a reassuring smile. She gave Jacob one of her signature smirks that had the ability to melt his heart no matter what.

“I’m sorry for how I handled things. I should have been honest with you.” She said, taking his other hand into hers. Jacob squeezed it warmly, telling her she was forgiven.

“I’m sorry for being a dick. Then and now. You’re too good for this world, you know?”

Before she could respond, the two jumped at the sound of John’s voice.

“Ava! Are you over here, my sugar plum?” He called out. Jacob rolled his eyes at the obnoxious pet name. Ava released Jacob’s hands immediately and called out.

“I’m over here, sweetie!”

John appeared into view, coming around the back of the jeep, glancing at Jacob and then to Ava. He didn’t look surprised.

“And what are you two discussing about so far away from the church?” he asked, jealously thick in his voice. Ava’s eyes grew large as she wracked her brain for a viable excuse.

“I was going to return Ava’s stuff before I left.” Jacob said, unlocking his trunk to retrieve the duffel bag of clothing and trinkets. He frowned as he remembered that bottle of her perfume that sat atop everything, wishing he had remembered to keep it. John grinned at the innocent reason.

“Great! Are you ready to head home, dear?” He said, placing the duffel bag’s strap on his shoulder. He took one of her hands, lacing his fingers around hers. Jacob got another glimpse of her tattoo and then noticed a matching one on John’s arm.

“I am! Let me just say bye to Jacob and I’ll catch up.”

Before John released her hand, he gave a stern side-eye to Jacob, as if telling him to watch his manners. Jacob turned to John and gave him a bear hug, signaling to the younger brother that he understood. John pulled back and gave Jacob one last nod before walking a few meters to get out of earshot.

Jacob was about to hold his arm out for a platonic handshake, but instead Ava’s arms wrapped around his neck. It felt like nothing had changed based on how tightly her body was pressed against him and how perfectly her head fitted into the crook of his neck. Jacob wrapped his arms around her waist, feeling the soft material of her dress, and he held on. Jacob could smell her lavender and vanilla scented perfume. The enticing scent brought him back in time, reliving the most endearing and painful memories he had of Ava. Jacob felt like he was seconds away from snatching her up and throwing her into his jeep, fleeing Hope County never to be seen again. But she whispered into his ear, interrupting his fantasy.

“I hope you find someone you can love unconditionally one day.”

She pulled away, removing her arms from around his neck. Jacob removed his hands slowly from around her waist, knowing this would be the last time. Without any warning, she planted a kiss on his cheek, her lips still so warm. With one last smile, she skipped back to John. Jacob went around the side of his car following her, unable to tear his eyes from her. She came up to John and picked up one of his hands. Jacob couldn’t hear what she told John, but he had an idea. John’s mouth fell open as he dropped the duffel bag to the ground.

“I love you, Ava.” He exclaimed, picking her up into his arms, giving her a passionate kiss on the mouth. Jacob thought about how he had never lifted her off the ground like that. That’s when Jacob knew that even though he was still in love with her, everything would be okay.


End file.
